RELATION WITH PARENTS

We humans are surrounded my relations from all the sides, majority of these are created by us to make us happy. With so many relations we create lines of priorities to separate one from another, but there are some relations for whom we don’t have any line and those relations are not created by us, they are god gifted. Today I want to throw some light on one of the relations, RELATION WITH PARENTS.

We get parents as god gift and they act as our mentors for our life, they tell us the difference between right-wrong, good-bad, we respect them more then god and we are ready to anything for there happiness. Well I have a question here, do we actually do that? One can answer this as “yes” and “no”. Do we actually follow their learning’s in our life? I guess the best answer for this would be yes we follow them but with modifications. We customize the learning as per us and then we follow them in our life, is that correct?

We do many things in our life and go sad or happy with the result of it, the most important part in that is our parents they also go happy and sad with us, but we ignore that in most of the cases. Is this what they deserve?

Once we grow up we starts taking decisions in our life, and the bad side of this is we either don’t include our parents in our decision or we ignore their opinion, we generally say its our life and let us live the way we want to life. There are cases when we children starts treating them as slaves or as burden on us, which I feel this is greatest sin and we should realize it.

In this relation the worst thing that we do is, we do many things in our life which are not only wrong as per them but they are wrong as per us as well but we behave in front of them as if we are the best child in this whole world and we never did anything wrong in our life, and by doing this we create a guilt in us which never goes out from us, I feel we should not maintain any relation just for sake of having a relation but we should maintain a relation because want that relation for us.

By writing this blog I just want to bring few things that we should not do with our parents and by this I don’t want to heart anyone’s feelings.

Moving in n out

Sometime I think what is more important between presence and absence of someone in our life. Although we all need people in our life at every step of our life but at many times we want someone should not come in front, sometimes we don’t want someone to go away from life and sometime we don’t want someone to come in our life. I always get confused in these lines and so writing this such that I can get the comments from you people on the same.

As per my point of view we should take time in understanding a person before we let him/her to enter our life and once that person come in our life he/she is ours forever. On the other hand we can control things like this from one end, i.e ours but what if we made a mistake in understanding the person or after spending some time you realize that both of you cannot move together? That happens in our life everyday and that is the reason people come and go from our lives.

What should happen if someone goes away from your life? Should we have a option left for that person to come back in any form or by any relation? What should happen if after some time you realize that you want that that person should come back in your life? Once again I get confused by all such questions and as a fact I don’t have any answer. I believe once a person goes away from your life or you move away from your life there should not be any way to come/go back.

Movie touching people

We find out many ways to make ourselves happy, watching movies are one way for the same, I am sure we all watches movies either in movie theater of in home. Today after reaching to office me and my friend were feeling bored so we decided to watch a movie in theater and we thought of a movie and moved from office, after reaching to theater we found that due to some technical problems the movie we wanted to see was not to be shown so we asked person sitting in tickets counter to give us 2 tickets for whatever movie is going to start in next 15 min, and he gave us “TOY STORY 3”, movie started and since I never likes toys to much to I was not enjoying the movie to start with, on the other hand my friend used to play with many toys in his childhood age and so he got connected with the movie, during intermission I said “It seems I am over aged for the movie” on which he said NO, after taking few things to eat and drink we came back on our seats to watch the movie. The second half of the movie was very emotional as it was around the facts that when a kid grows he/she stops playing with toys and then he need to decide if he wants to give the toys to someone or just wanted to throw them.

Movie was going on and then I realized a weeping sound, when I looked at my friend I found he was crying, I asked him what happened in reply he said nothing, I didn’t asked him again as I was able to understand the cause of that.

Few interesting questions to ask:

1. Is it true that we will remain kids whatever be our age?
2. We don’t connect to things happening around as, but we get connected to a movie?
3. Is it true to say movies are somewhere from realities only?

STORY OF CURSE AND LOVE

Story of curse and love

We all have seen many mythological movies/ serials and acts and most interesting part of the act is when a saint take some water in his/her hands and after swearing to god says some bad words and throws that water on the person, and then all sorts of problem starts in that persons life, but this all happens in act or movies right? If your answer is yes, then think about it again as I am going to share a story on same lines…

This story starts somewhere around 5 years down the line, there was a boy who was starting his new life by entering into MCA program as his next level of education, he was very sure that he is not going to involve in any girlfriend relation, but god had created a different route for him, and he fall in love with a girl during 2^nd semester of his program, they both were having different family values and as a fact they both were different humans as well. Boy used to care for time and for him even a second was really important, but on the other hand for that girl time was just another item to play with. This was one of many differences between them but still they both were connected in a relation full of feelings called LOVE. Due course of time they started caring for each other and on the other hand sometimes they used to fight, time passed and intensity of fight started increasing and in few days that intensity overshoots the feeling of love and then one fine day they fought of almost complete day and at the end girl was so frustrated that she said “Ja tu kabhi kush nahi rahega, magar to is baat ko kisi ko bata nahi payaga ki tu kush nahi hai” English- you will never be happy and you will never be able to express this to anyone around you. Happiness of boy ended when that girl told him that she is unhappy because of him and as per her that boy never wanted her to be happy. In few days that relation ended with girl getting married to someone else, that boy broken into pieces but was able to recover in few days by knowing that girl is happy in her life.

It was time to move on for both of them, girl was very happy in her life and her life was flying and rocking, but for boy his life was surrounded with that curse which neither boy nor that girl remembered. Happiness used to come closer to boy but used to fly away with wings even before he could even feel it.

Whole point of writing this was to find out that way by which that boy can come out of that curse and I am sure there will be some way to come out of it, can you help that boy?

Waiting for your reply….

Movie Vs Life

Sometimes I think what is the difference between life and a movie, I never got to know the difference, it seems that life also moves the same way a movie goes i.e starting with a happy note, while moving to intermission clouds of sadness moves in and no one is happy at that, people cry and tension everywhere.

Current phase of my life is moving as if I am in mid of intermission as no one is happy around me, my parents are really unhappy. After a perfect start they all were very happy, due course of time happiness melts down to sadness, current situation is so pathetic that it is just sadness and crying all around.

I hope you might have read my last blog, this blog is in continuation with the same, by this I wanted to come up with aftereffects of a drama which is played by few people and made others life hell. Few people came in our life and who comes like angels and goes away from our life with a curse and oceans of pain and frustration.

I hope the actual cause given to humans by god is to make others happy, it is also said by a song “aapne liye jiye to kaya jiye, ey dil to jee zamane ke liye”. But as per my observation we people moved many steps away from our cause now days we are after other peoples happiness, I always see people going un-happy as a result of any other is happy.

I wanted to appeal all of you that start thinking about the fact that why we are here, and what is our aim of life, I am making a small step towards this thinking and hope that you all will join your steps to make this small start into a big one.

Maamla Shadi ka : Marrige

Disclaimer:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is based on a real story, narrator changed the names of persons and places in the story. Any similarity will be a coincidence. By this narrator just wanted to come up with change is human values and human thinking.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I never thought I will be writing something of this kind, as this form of human behavior is present only in movies, but after experiencing this I can always say things like this also exists in real life, well its enough of background let me jump on the story.

This long story starts on 28th May 2010 when few people (Ladki ke Ghar Waale) visited my home to have a talk with me for her daughter. They were supposed to reach my home at 5:00 PM but instead they reached at 10AM. I was in office at that time, my father called me at 6:00PM to confirm where I am, I told him that I will be able to reach at around 7:30PM or may be bit more delay (God started giving the signal from word go). That day traffic was more then expected, although travelling from Gurgaon to Delhi is always full of fun :). I reached home at 7:45PM and then my interview starts, they were 2 and I was all alone to face their questions, moment they saw me they started firing questions like where you work, salary, job timings etc. after 5 min or so I was fed up with them and was feeling like running away from there but one can’t do that, after around 15 min the best time comes when they said they are done with talking to me and now they wanted to go back home and then they will give the update to me, after saying that they somehow handed Rs. 1000/- to me which I didn’t liked as girls father gave money in a “shagan ka lifafa” which was folded like anything.

Wind of happiness started flowing in my house everyone all of a sudden started looking happy, my mother was so excited that she started to look for marriage date and dates for other ceremonies. I bore their happiness by saying “Ladki se mil to lo ek baar, aagar aapko sab kuchtheek lage to jo man main aaye karma”, they decided to visit Mysore (Karnataka India), as per girls parents her exams were on and nest exam was on 2nd June and last was on 12th June so my parents thought since time gap between second last and last exam was 10 days, so they planned to visit Mysore on 3rd that is the day after girls second exam. Everyone in my family was very happy.

3rd of June started on a bad note for me, after I got out from my bed I slipped and my right leg got hurt, but I started my daily preparations for going to office, that day I had to catch my office bus as from that day only my cab was discontinued, so I left my house at 7:15 AM (15 min before time), after I stepped out of my home, I called friend (Anil) who still goes in cab and after talking to him I decided to go along with him only in cab as there was a extra space available. After reaching my normal cab pickup point I started arranging my bag, then I realized that this day going to show some more colors as I just saw that one of my watch was found broken in my bag (I Love all the watches, I am crazy about watches) that was a sad moment but I was not having any alternative for that so I put all my items back in bag and started waiting for my cab to reach and after around 10 min or so cab reached. Cab had just moved around 1KM from my pickup point, I found that my valet was not in my trouser’s pocket and then I started finding that in my bag but it was not there, I asked my cab driver to take the cab back to my pickup point as I thought I might find my valet lying out there but after reaching back I was disappointed and tears come in my eyes. Anil said why don’t I confirm that from my home? As a result of his question I called on my bhabhi’s cell and asked her to find my valet also I told her that I found my watch broken on which she said its ok as you have so many watches, while talking to me she searched all the places where my valet could have been found but she was unable to find it :(, after putting down the phone I started thinking what all was there in the valet, and up to what I was able to recollect, that valet was containing around 6,500 cash, 6 silver coins (coins from Vaishno Devi Mandir), my Citibank debit card, my Citibank credit card , credit card of HDFC bank and some more documents like my driving license etc. I was really upset as nothing had gone right from morning so was talking to my office friends and trying to change my mind but at around 12AM my mother call me and said that they met the girl (Rakhi) and she liked her very much and wanted to now my decision on which I said do whatever you people wanted to do (I know that was rude but my situation was really bad), I wanted to disclose what all happened with me from morning to my mother but I kept my mum shut as I don’t wanted them to be un happy. Then I received call from my father at around 3-3.30 where he confirmed that they said yes for Rakhi. They (parents) were very happy, they have to return from Bangalore on the same day and there train was at 5:00PM from there which they boarded on time. It was a 33 Hr travel from them to reach to Delhi till then this message started flowing and I started hearing a statements like marriage date would be somewhere around 28th June only and I was really up happy with that news but since that date was not confirmed by my parents I was bit relaxed. Mom and dad reached back home and talks started around my taking leaves from office, the duration, and the most important was date(s). One pandit ji from Rakhi’s end came up with date for engagement as 25th June and 28th as marriage and my parents accepted and started with shopping and other arrangements, that was Saturday when they gave me a list of items which I had to buy by that day only, I called up my friend and told him the fact and also asked him to help me in shopping and shopping kicked off. In one single day we spent around Rs 80,000/- in shopping, and arrangements continues on Sunday as well.

Monday was planned shopping for Aditya (my nephew), I reached home a bit early on that day as I went to office via my bike due to the fact that I being to license authority to give a request for my lost license. Moment I entered in my home I heard my mom talking to someone and her voice as not very pleasant, her words confirms me that there is some problem. After she ended the call I asked her but she didn’t told me anything, and after having 1 min talk with my dad they both went downstairs to have a walk, in mean while Bhabhi along with Aditya reached back home and I shared my assumption with her, my words him her as if I pulled up the trigger of a gun and bullet entered in her body. Later I tried again to confirm the same with my mom but was unable to get the facts out, in late evening my father gave us a statement that stop shopping now as he need to arrange some more cash on which I said I have some in my account which can be used on that mom said don’t use that money on this. My assumption was moving in a right direction and for next 3 days we didn’t spent any money in shopping. On Thursday evening my mom asked me to come along with her as she wanted to talk to Rakhi for the first time :), I called her up from my cell and as expected she was not very comfortable talking on which I said we will talk some other time and hung the phone. On Friday there was a small party with my office friends which started after office hours and ended at around 12:00 Night, coz of which I reached home at 1:00 AM, at that time only I realized that next day was Saturday day for last exam, so I send a sms to Rakhi’s friends mobile number as Rakhi was not having any mobile. My message was:

“Message for Rakhi: good luck for tomorrows exam”

And after sending the sms I went to sleep, next morning I got a reply “thanks”. Things again started changing, I got a call from a unknown caller and he said that he is aware of the fact that me and Rakhi were getting engaged and because of which Rakhi was not happy, she don’t wanted to get into this, after asking a lot he disclosed his name as “Rahul”. I without informing this story to my family members I went out of my home and called on Rakhi’s friends mobile and told everything to Rakhi, on which she said she is not aware of this and she don’t know anyone by this name, then I gave her the mobile number from which I got the call and asked her to try and find out who the person is, for doing this she told everything to her parents along with mobile number, her father called up my dad in 30 min and confirmed that that number was with someone called Sanjay and that number was from Noida, having said that they were relaxed. In mean while after meeting one my friend I reached back home and then my dad told me that this number is of Noida so I need to find out if any of my friend did this as a prank, on which I started finding the information over internet and after using many websites and software I conformed that that number was from Karnataka, Bangalore, Mysore. Which Rakhi’s parents excepted by the lave evening, after talking to me and my dad, her father said he will try and find out who that person is and in case he will not be able do so then they will reach out to police to get the further investigation done on which I and my father agrees and asked him to take the required action. Tension started creeping as poison mixes with blood, any how we all slept and Sunday we all started again on the same topic, my father called up her father and asked what is there plan for the day on that? As a reply he said that they know someone in Reliance (as that number was of Reliance mobile) and in next 2 hrs they will be able to find out who the person is and they will update us by 1:00 PM, but they didn’t called us till 4:00, as o asked my dad to called her dad and ask for the update, on which her dad said that they were not able to find the person and now they will file a FIR against that number and will forward the scan copies to us over email. At 8:00PM I had a word with her dad and as per him they got to know who that person is in morning only at around 11:00 PM, after me asking what all actions they took answer as nothing as they thought that was not required. Then I asked for FIR and on that he repeated the same answer, after talking to him for more the 40 min I was able to console him for the FIR and as per him he will do that in next 30 min, but after 30 min he called up my dad again and said they will not file a case against that number as they don’t want to do the same, in the meanwhile I had a long conversation with my dad and mom and our common stand was ask no to them for marriage and to start with say that marriage is postpone for some time as we wanted to solve this problem first, so might think about this in month of November or December. Rakhi’s family gave a positive response on this and they agrees that.

Few Hidden Facts:

First call which comes to my home was done for Rakhi only, but she never agrees to that as she wanted to look clean and clear from all the angels.

By mistake her father gave us the correct name of the person that in Sanjay as the caller which they later on said someone as Jyoti. As a fact that number belongs to Sanjay and he lives in Mysore only.

Rakhi’s family was aware of everything but they always hided everything with us.

After doing a deep dive into this I come up the conclusion that, everything was planned like a movie script but was badly executed as end of this would have been vary dangerous like killing someone or even more then that.

As I always talk about human values:

Wanted to know what kind of value is this?

What make a person to think like this?

Why people like these exists in world?

Do we really need these kind of person?

Should we call these persons as humans?